Treating Spiritual Disorders
Recent Reflections
THE THOUGHTFUL OPENING OF THE HEART
Our lives are not often so dramatic. Distractions in the form of desire for coming to be now, or the compelling need to accomplish something, or self consciousness and other similar problems take the place of the quietude of easy movement within the flow of what is becoming. Ignoring or forcing the sequence of events otherwise emerging into continuity distracts from our awareness of continuance: Continuance being the ongoing nature of presence--- blessings ever with us. Our meditations may assist us to live within absence, the unity of stillness and motion; subjective foundations for presence and continuance...
YIELDING
When my life unfolds
as does the blossom,
I am content to live fully,
even ask for more
of what I have wanted
to receive.
My heart opens
joy is what I feel
as well as
the softer tones
of contentment.
This is the way to be
and we have known of it
from before infancy,
even birth.
The rhythms of our hearts
offered sweet music
for our comfort
in those days and nights
of tranquility
and the forward movement
of living gave meaning
amidst the satisfactions
therein.
II
Then as if suddenly begun
and continuing on
for so many years
there came another way....
wherein bursts of electricity
told me to correct myself.
Oops, uh oh, darn,
stop, go back,
retrace your steps
and in so many ways
end the process of living
as this moment,
(from some internal instruction
telling me)
must not go on.
Within this new way
I was required to live
an endless series of corrections
yet never righting myself
only reeling from side to side
back and forth endlessly
as if throughout eternity
my hope in life would be
to yearn for the tides
and rhythms of comfort
that I might feel
from time to time
as chance harmonies
might bless me.
In the quietude of this moment
I envision, seeing once again
the softness of yielding within
and continuing on.
I see how it is upon
disappointment's entry
to my life
I close the door
upon my future
As if through
these startling practices
I can stop my world
and abandon what it is
I do not wish to live.
In exchange I reside
in the way station
at disappointment's door
until once again
I may accept my future.
Seeing how this has been
but an invitation to disrelationship
I now come to accept
life's travails and blessings
and come upon the future
welcoming the unknown.
Here is a living meditation.
As these moments come upon you
to hurry yourself,
your course with urgency
reactions and perceived
infractions and all
or gain something,
vainly attempting to overcome
some perceived deficiency
say to the stopping moment
that would halt you
in your tracks...
"I have conceived you
through many years
of pain and torment
perpetuating my imbalance
through you
that through urgency
I might read the map,
find my way, stay alive,
survive, be on time, saying
I have left undone
those things
I ought to have done,
and done those things
I ought not
to have done
and there is no health in me...
then placing my faith
in these impediments:
thus damaging the moment,
and my movement
into the future.
Obscuring continuance.
I will now begin
by watching you.
for I can not
immediately remove you.
I will become familiar with you
knowing that I may live skillfully
without you."
Then seeing these things
come to pass
and the returning comforts
of inner peace
I will see life
as besheret
that is,
meant to be
The thoughtful opening of the heart
does not offend
neither does it take offense
There is neither language nor thought which can take us beyond the effects of self doubt and vulnerability. What these musings may provide are opportunities to bring ourselves to an acceptance that all self doubt and vulnerability are manifestations of unnecessarily constructing and maintaining devalued ways of living. Moving past them into the unknown offers relief, acceptance and in time good will.
next reflection - THE TAKING ON OF POWER - COMING HOME